Um, can I get a re-write???

It sure is AND I am officially the mother of a teenager now!  YIKES!!!!! There is reall nothing to talk about... No really, not much.  So, I'll share some gratitude with you! FIVE EFFING YEARS CANCER FREE BABY!!!! Shelby Wilbur Coco My amazing friends (I love you SO very much!) Sunshine (I miss you so!) Generic Zyrtec! My job (and fantastic boss who knows nothing about this blog) Surviving over a month in the same house as a teenage girl Being able to keep on going! Speaking of going... I have dipped my toe back into the dating waters. No date(s) yet, but thinking about it. Okay, there is one thing that I would LOVE to talk (brag) about, but I can't.  All I can say is that my kid is the AWESOMEST kid and friend ever!  I'm  hoping that I will be able to elaborate sometime in the future.  But, until then, I am so proud that my daughter is BRAVE and stood up for others who couldn't stand up for themselves.  My kid's got cajones!  woot...

What is  s canxiety?  It's the anxious, nervous, stressed out feeling that creeps up before scan time.  I used to have to go in for a long MRI & chest x-ray every three months, then after three years I graduated to every six months for the last two years.  Tomorrow I am going to Chicago (Northwestern Memorial) for my MRI & chest x-ray.  I get the results on the 12th and if everything goes well, I should be bumped out to ANNUAL check-ups!  I had this idea in my head of how this checkup would be so different because I had someone special in my life who would hold my hand and celebrate with me.  But, he's gone away, right before the big test, and for good as far as I can tell.  I thought I had finally met Mr. Right.  The man of my dreams (okay, he snored loudly and was human), but he was my goofy man, and he made me laugh and feel safe.  This was going to be the year that we would be together and things would...

It is almost 1am on Tuesday. I am exhausted. I am nauseous. I am scared. I don't know why, but this is more than my usual pre-checkup anxiety. Maybe it's all snowballed into the last 24 hours instead of a little each day for 7-10 days prior. Who knows. All I know is I feel like I'm going to puke. My head is pounding. I don't want to go to the doctor tomorrow and I'm scared that he's going to tell me the cancer is back. No, I have no reason to think it's back. But, 3 1/2 years ago, I went in for hernia surgery and woke up hearing them talk about "the mass" and two days later I was told that I had an extremely rare form of cancer. This year has been hell. I'm just worn out. I have wonderful friends, but they have got lives of their own. My family, well, I can't depend on them or go to them with my fears or worries. I've had to carry all of this for so long, I just want a break. A break from drama. A break from cancer and the worry tha...

Hello Friends! Yes, I'm changing the blog layout again. I decided I needed something less PINK!! So, until Traci has time to fix the heading or show me how the heck to edit the heading template, the blog is gonna look a little bit silly. Here comes the rambling!!!! Shelby hit her head on Monday night. According to Shelby, it was all my fault! I'm going to try to explain what happened... Try to stay with me, k? I was in the bathroom combing my hair in front of the mirror. Shelby decided she just had to hang onto me like a monkey (behind me, arms around my neck). Shelby doesn't weigh 30 pounds anymore, she weighs 90 pounds and was hurting my back. I asked several times for her to let go. "No, I will never let go Mommy!" as cute as could be. I bumped her lightly with my rear and she must've let go at that exact moment and she fell backward, but sideways into the tub and smacked her head on the lip of the tub! We do not do anything half way in the O...