I've got to get some rest!
I am worn out! Lots of things going on.
I'm pretty much constantly thinking about surgery (is the insurance going to approve it? when are they going to approve it? when will my surgery finally happen? why is it taking so frickin long????) That has definitely taken it's toll!
Today I spoke with Rose, the coordinator at the bariatric center. She said still no news. She assured me that things are definitely on the right track, but it's going to take more time. That means:
- no surgery in the month of November :(
- Karen will be back in Switzerland before my surgery :(
I was really hoping she'd be here because, well, she's Karen! She's an absolutely wonderful friend. She can put up with cranky MB and sassy Shelby, and she loves Wilbur (but who doesn't?) Now I'm sad. I'm sad because while I am sure things will work out, I have absolutely no idea how they will work out. And, I'm tired. Tired of waiting. This started eight months ago. I have done every single thing that the insurance required. I suppose my first mistake was thinking that since I followed all the rules, everyone else would... The insurance company's original mistake has delayed all of this by more than three weeks now! I am so ready to start the next phase of my life! Seeing a picture that Karen took this week killed me. It was just a kick in the gut as to how big I've gotten! I really hate this!
I'm praying that on Monday, when I call Rose again, she has the insurance approval. At least then we can set a surgery date and I will have something to focus on. Right now, all I can focus on is how exhausted I am, how long I've waited, good God my back hurts from my ginormous chest & belly! This is really getting on my nerves, can you tell?
Then there is the continuing issue of the ever growing back child support (I think he's nearing $9000 now).
Oh, and my former lawyer is harrassing me for money. Yes, I hired her to get back child support. I haven't gotten any. How does that work, huh? Her office didn't care that I have no money either. I have heard stories about lawyers being money hungry, but I truly thought she was different. I thought she was really listening to me and working for ME. She was just looking for the money, which was made very obvious when she refused to take my case to the judge and coerced me into making a "deal" with Dana. Yeah, again, I haven't gotten any money. Oh, and now he's working for cash, so they can't even trace him! Grrrrrrrr!
Now that I've vented about that, here's a bunch 'o' gratitude!
- Stellan (the little boy on the button on the right side of my blog) is doing well! He had ablation (I think that's what it's called) and he is doing SO much better. Please check out his mom's blog (just click on the picture). A Miracle!
- Desi, the little girl who had been badly injured when a dresser & tv fell on her last week is home! I don't have any more news, but her being home after spending several days in the PICU pretty much unresponsive is EXCELLENT! Another Miracle!
- Karen is here! I wonder if we'd get along so well if she lived in the U.S. Hmmmm... She's a reality check for me. I really appreciate it too. 'Cuz this mom can get wound up tight & a little too wrapped up in her kid and not focused enough on her own life. I am SO glad she is visiting!
- I think we've decided to go to Chicago to watch the Thanksgiving Day Parade in Thanksgiving. Last Thanksgiving was filled with crazy family & lots of drama. I am going to avoid that from now on! Must protect me & Shelby! So, the parade will be pretty darn cool I think. Hopefully we'll have good weather and will be able to get some great shots of me & Shelby and Karen. Maybe we'll get the perfect shot for this year's Christmas card!
- Since I don't have a surgery date, Karen & I are going to Chicago next Saturday! First up is Ruth's Chris for yummy filet (for me, not sure what Karen will get) and then on to Davenport's Piano Bar. A friend from MN is a bartender there. I haven't seen him in over 25 years!
- I am taking a vacation day tomorrow! What will I do? Why, I will REST & RELAX! I may even sleep most of the day away!
- DIRT! No, really! We have the dirt in the front yard now. Before the snow falls and accumulates I'm going to have to move the stone over into the culvert to aid in "guiding" the darn water away from the house. But, the dirt is here!
- I have got some FREAKING AWESOME people around me! I feel like the lady from Romper Room now "I see Karen and Traci, Crystina and Dennis, there's Rosa and Michell, oh and Joanie and Margaret..." Seriously, does anyone remember that show??? Okay, anyway - I am so very lucky to have the aforementioned people in addition to Emanuel, Kim, Jessica, Vivian, Bea, Stephanie and many other people (some more from work strangely enough) who really show me the love when I need it. And, they make me laugh (at myself mostly) when I need that too.
- I am so grateful for Shelby's counselor. Without her, I would feel like a complete failure as a mother at times. She is able to help me deal with the pre-teen who is testing her boundaries more and more every day. Oh, and she also tells me I am a pushover as well. Must work on that!
- Tonight and this weekend, I have my room to myself. That means I don't have to tiptoe around so I won't wake Shelby. I need a little peace right now and Karen is visiting another friend for the weekend.
- Being alive!
- Indoor plumbing!
- My fantastic job!
- My awesome boss!
- The (mostly) cool people at work ;o)~
Thank you my friends, for listening (reading) and showing me compassion or just humoring me when I need it!
Love and blessings to all of you!!!!